Crete's Paradise Found: Villa Vicina - 4 Minutes From Platanias Beach!
Okay, buckle up buttercups, because we're diving headfirst into the turquoise waters (hopefully, metaphorically) of Crete's Paradise Found: Villa Vicina! Forget the usual bland travel reviews – I'm here to tell you the truth, warts and all, and maybe even convince you to book a trip. This is gonna be messy, honest, and hopefully, a bit hilarious.
Alright, so let's break this down. Villa Vicina boasts being a mere four minutes from Platanias Beach. Emphasis on the minutes. That already sounds good, right? No one wants to spend half their vacation trekking to the sand. But let's see if this place actually delivers on the promises.
Accessibility: The Good, the (Potentially) Bad, and the “Hmm…”
Okay, first off: Wheelchair accessible. They say it. But, and this is a big but, I couldn’t find specifics. Like, are the ramps easy to navigate? Are the bathrooms truly accommodating? I REALLY needed to know this! So, if you need a truly accessible space, I'd recommend a thorough phone call to clarify those details. Don't just take my word for it, folks. In this respect, it sounds a little… incomplete.
Internet, Internet, Everywhere… (Hopefully Working!)
Free Wi-Fi in all rooms! Music to my ears. And they claim LAN access too. Fancy. In this day and age, a decent Wi-Fi connection is practically a human right. Seriously, how am I going to Instagram all those sunset shots if my connection is slower than a snail on tranquilizers? I'm assuming it's reliable. I'd hate to have to rely on the lobby Wi-Fi.
Cleanliness and Safety - Fingers and Toes Crossed!
OK, pandemic times, right? Anti-viral cleaning products? Check. Daily disinfection in common areas? Check. Rooms sanitized between stays? YES, PLEASE! The paranoia travel gods have planted in me require it. This all sounds reassuring, but I want to see the evidence, yaknow? I'm the kind of person who wipes down the TV remote with a disinfectant wipe even when I'm at home. I did note they had hot water linen and laundry washing, which sounds like a good start to keeping you safe! Staff trained in safety protocol? Great, I hope they were paying attention in class. Room sanitization opt-out available – Interesting. Shows they're trying to be flexible, right? Safe Dining Setup: This is vital and I’d expect nothing less. Let's hope it means more than just a table with a single-use paper tablecloth. Hand sanitizer? Good. But I hope they have it everywhere. Hygiene certification – Does it have it? That's the question – and a deal maker or breaker for many.
Dining, Drinking, and Snacking: The Foodie's Field Day (Maybe?)
Alright, let’s get to the good stuff: FOOD. They have restaurants and restaurants. That's vague! What kind of restaurants? Restaurants! (This is the part where I cross my fingers). A la carte in restaurant? Good, good. I hate boring buffets. Breakfast [buffet] sounds exciting! Breakfast service is an asset. But, you know, buffets can be a gamble. Asian cuisine in restaurant? Now that's interesting. I'm picturing delicious dim sum on the beach! Poolside bar is pretty much a REQUIREMENT. And happy hour? Yes. Just yes. Happy Hour is practically a sport when you're on vacation. Snack bar, always handy for those mid-afternoon grazes when you're not up for a full meal. Room service [24-hour] – Hallelujah! Late-night pizza and a movie? Don't mind if I do! Coffee/tea – I think this is in the restaurant, right? I'm a caffeine addict, and if they don't sort me out in the mornings, well, let's just say things get messy.
I want some bottle of water, at least. Some places skimp on that to charge you $10 for a little plastic bottle.
Services and Conveniences: The Stuff That Makes Life Easier
Concierge is essential. I need someone to handle the details. “Hey, Concierge, can you get me reservations at that amazing taverna everyone's raving about? And maybe arrange a scooter for tomorrow?” Cash withdrawal! Thank god. I always seem to run out of Euros faster than a cheetah on Red Bull. Doorman. Nice touch. Makes you feel like a VIP, even if you're just average Joe. Daily housekeeping. Please and thank you. I make enough mess in my own house. Dry cleaning, because sometimes you overpack and realize you need to look presentable for a special dinner. Luggage storage: Always helpful, especially on check-out days. Elevator: Essential if you’re not a fan of stairs (me). Gift/souvenir shop: I'm already picturing those tacky-but-endearing "I Heart Crete" t-shirts.
Things to Do, Ways to Relax: Spa Day…or Not?
Okay, this is where it gets REALLY interesting. They've listed a truckload of offerings: Fitness center, Gym/fitness, I'm kinda assuming they are literally the same (the latter is a duplicate). I'm too lazy to even think about working out on vacation, so I'll take a pass. Pool with view, Swimming pool, Swimming pool [outdoor] – Great! A pool is a must. Spa/sauna, Sauna, Spa, Steamroom. Now we're talking! A sauna is like a hug from a hot rock. Massage. YES. I need to de-stress. Body scrub, Body wrap, Foot Bath: Sounds luxurious but also a tad unnecessary. Let's be honest, the pool is the main thing.
For the Kids: Is This a Family Paradise?
Babysitting service: That could be useful. Family/child friendly: Again, it says it. Kids meal: Sounds good, if the kids are happy, the parents are happy. Kids facilities: What are these, though? A playground? A dedicated pool? More details needed!
Available in all rooms (Important!)
- Air conditioning. A MUST in Crete.
- Coffee/tea maker! Yes please.
- Hair dryer -- another MUST.
- Free Wi-Fi.
- Mini bar -- gotta have the refreshments.
- Refrigerator. A sanity-saver for keeping water cold.
Getting Around:
Airport transfer: Definitely a plus. Who wants to haggle over a taxi after a long flight? Car park [free of charge], This is huge. Parking in tourist areas can be a nightmare. Taxi service: Good.
The BIG Question: Is It Worth It?
Okay, so after all that…is Villa Vicina the ultimate Cretan paradise? Maybe. The location is amazing, and the amenities sound promising. However, I need a bit more clarity on accessibility, and I'd want to read real-life reviews about the Wi-Fi.
My Quirky Observation and Final Verdict!
My overall feeling is… cautiously optimistic. I'm a sucker for a good pool, and the idea of a 4-minute walk to the beach is pure gold. The 24-hour room service? Sold. The spa? Definitely going to check that out. But I'll need to do some more research. Based on what's listed, I'd give it a solid 4 out of 5 stars IF everything works as advertised.
Here’s My Unique Offer for You!
Okay, here’s where I come in. Book Villa Vicina NOW! Because I’m assuming that if you book through my link right here, I'll get a small commission (or maybe not, but let's pretend!).
The "I'm Not Kidding" Offer:
If you book through my link and you find that the Wi-Fi is crap, the spa is meh, or the food is just… bleh, send me a photo of your sad, disappointed face on the beach, and I'll PERSONALLY write a strongly worded letter to the management (or at least complain on your behalf through a review). I'll even offer you a digital high-five. So, what are you waiting for? Don’t delay! Book your Cretan adventure and maybe, just maybe, end up in paradise, too!
Bali's BEST Private Villa Escape: Ozkar's Pool Paradise Awaits!
Okay, buckle up, buttercups, because this isn't your grandma's travel itinerary. This is my travel itinerary, forged in the fires of impulse, caffeine, and a desperate need for sun, sea, and maybe a decent plate of feta. Villa Vicina, Platanias, Crete – here we come! (And by "we," I mean me… and my increasingly optimistic luggage).
Arrival & Day 1: The Hairy Above (and Below) of Platanias - aka, "Will This Place Actually Exist?"
Morning (ish): Land in Chania. Holy moly, how does anyone navigate this airport? Okay, deep breaths. Find the rental car (a Clio, bless its tiny heart, probably named "Clio" by some bored rental agent).
- Impression #1: A slight panic. "Will I have the right ID? Do I remember how to drive a manual? Are the Greeks secretly plotting to make me crash into a donkey cart?"
- *Anecdote: The last time I rented a car abroad, I accidentally drove on the *wrong* side of the road for a solid 10 kilometers. Let's not repeat that, shall we?*
Midday: Drive to Villa Vicina. The drive is supposed to be scenic. Hope so, 'cause I'm relying on Google Maps and a prayer.
- Impression #2: The scenery had better be decent, because the "scenic" bus ride was NOT scenic, it was HOT and with screaming children. I will not repeat that experience.
- Quirky Observation: I swear, the Greeks drive like they were born in the cockpit of a fighter jet. Is it the olive oil? The ouzo? The general disdain for seatbelts? (Just kidding, mostly.)
Afternoon: Arrive at Villa Vicina! Check-in. Unpack (eventually). Collapse on the… bed. Is this air conditioning on?
- Impression #3: Initially, it was a "Whoa, this is even nicer than the pictures!" moment. Until I realized the WiFi password was in ancient Greek. And then the fridge wasn't working. Oh, the joys of travel.
- Emotional Reaction: First? Pure Glee! Finally, a place I can call my own. Secondly, a deep, soul-crushing fatigue from the flight. Okay, naps are my best friends.
- Category: Minor category: The "toilet paper situation". Greece and toilet paper usage is, to put it mildly, challenging. I have two rolls. Two. I'm going to need to stock up. And learn to speak "where is your best plumbing?"
Evening: Walk towards the beach! Explore Platanias, find a taverna with outdoor seating (MUST HAVE VIEW). Order ALL THE Appetizers. Drink ALL THE wine.
- Impression #4: The beach WILL be busy, but that's okay. I'll find a spot by the sea even if I have to fight a seagull for it. Dinner? The search will commence. Dinner is EVERYTHING.
- Quirky Observation: The seagulls here look particularly judgmental. Like they're judging my travel wardrobe. Fair enough.
- Rambling: Okay, the appetizers are EVERYTHING. I bet they are worth the price of the trip.
Day 2: The Sea & The Sun (and Possibly, Regret)
Morning: Actually get to the beach, as opposed to the "sort of near to the beach" of yesterday. Swimming! Sunbathing! Realistically, I'll probably fall asleep in the sun.
- Impression #5: The water is turquoise! The beach is sandy! (And I don't know if I need sunscreen…I'm going to take a chance.
- Emotional Reaction: Pure, unadulterated joy! This is what I came for. I'll soak it up!
Midday: Lunch. Lunch is the most important meal of my every day.
- Category: Eating out… and choosing. I can already feel the agony of decision paralysis settling in. Should I go for the fresh fish? The souvlaki? Or maybe just all of it?
Afternoon: Explore Platanias a little bit more. Maybe a boat trip? Or a mini-golf fiasco? (I make no promises about my mini-golf skills.)
- Quirky Observation: I'm starting to understand why Greece has so many gods; there's a god for everything, including the sheer volume of souvenirs. (Need a tiny ceramic amphora? They've got 'em.)
- Emotional Reaction: I am definitely feeling more relaxed now. I'm starting to be okay with not being on time. I feel amazing.
Evening: Find a different taverna for dinner. Ouzo, maybe? Consider the potential for making questionable decisions. (Spoiler alert: I'm leaning towards "yes.")
- Impression #6: So much food! So much wine! So many options!
Day 3: Getting Serious (Maybe)
Morning: Wake up (eventually). Head to the Chania again. Wander the old town. Get lost (intentionally this time). Embrace the chaos.
- Impression #7: Chania is like a postcard come to life. Everything looks stunning!
- Emotional Reaction: Oh, how I want to move here. I'm tempted to find property now.
Midday: Lunch in Chania. Find the best gyro. Find a coffee shop and sip the coffee.
- Anecdote: I will always remember the time I ate a gyro in Chania. The flavors, the meat, the pita bread… it was a transcendent experience. (Possibly a bit too much ouzo the night before.)
Afternoon: Explore the Venetian harbor.
- Impression #8: The houses are truly colorful. So. Many. Colors!
Evening: Head back to Platanias. Back to the Villa. Drink. Rest. Eat. The cycle continues.
- Emotional Reaction: This is the life. I could do this forever.
Day 4: Back to Base - The Beach:
Morning: Beach! Actually this time, I will give my best effort to get there.
- Impression #9: Did I mention the sand? The water? The endless sun?
Midday: Time to eat lunch.
- Category: Grocery store. Can do it again. Can do it again. Can do it agian.
Afternoon: More beach or maybe I'll go sit by the pool.
- Impression #10: The pool looks so perfect right now.
Evening: Dinner at the best place in town.
- Emotional Reaction: I may be more relaxed. I'm almost at peace.
Day 5 - Leaving - The Aftermath:
Morning: Pack (with tears). Pack (with no tears, for now).
- Impression #11: The packing here is actually better than expected. No meltdowns, here!
Midday: Drive to the airport. Pray the Clio doesn't give up on me.
- Anecdote: I will never forget the time I (almost) ran out of petrol while driving in Greece. I'm thankful I didn't. I'm glad I made it.
Afternoon: Depart.
- *Impression #12: Until next time, Crete!
- Emotional Reaction: I'm not ready to leave. I'm not. I don't want to go back to the real world. I'm going to miss this place.
Final Thoughts:
This, my friends, is a rough draft of an itinerary. Stuff will undoubtedly go wrong. I'll probably get lost, sunburned, and slightly tipsy on a daily basis. The point is, I'm going to create memories, and maybe, just maybe, I'll fall a little bit in love with Greece. Wish me luck! (And send more sunscreen.)
Unbelievable Monteverde Escape: Cabinas El Pueblo B&B Awaits!
Villa Vicina: Crete's Paradise Found (or, Did I Over-Hyped It?) - FAQs, Raw and Unfiltered
Okay, so the beach is really *that* close? That 4-minute thing... real?
Alright, look, I was skeptical too. Four minutes? My local grocery store claims a 2-minute drive, and it’s *lying*, okay? But… yeah. It's basically true. I walked it. My phone said 5 minutes, but I was dawdling, taking pictures of the bougainvillea, and pretending I knew what a "bougainvillea" was (apparently, it’s what makes your Instagram feed pop). So, *maybe* 5, tops. But it's *close*. Close enough that if you forget sunscreen, you could practically sprint back and forth before you turn lobster-red. That's a win, folks. A glorious, sun-kissed, potentially slightly-burnt win.
What's the deal with Platanias Beach itself? Is it crowded? Is it... nice?
Platanias Beach… ah, Platanias. It’s a tale of two beaches, really. During the high season, it's a bustling, vibrant, perhaps *slightly* over-stimulated playground. Think beach umbrellas as far as the eye can see, laughter, the sizzle of souvlaki, and a healthy dose of jet skis (some of which, I swear, are piloted by toddlers with better steering skills than me). But, you know what? It’s *fun*. There's a buzz, an energy. If you like a quieter vibe, earlier or later in the day is your best bet, though. I’m more of a “early bird gets the sunbed” kind of person, so I was mostly happy.
As for "nice"... the water is clear, the sand is... sandy. Perfect for building ridiculously elaborate sandcastles that get promptly annihilated by the tide. Which, let's be honest, is the whole point. The water is so clear you can spot the bottom. And the fish. Seriously, bring a snorkel (or rent one, lazy bum). I spotted a little fish that looked like it was wearing a tiny, shiny tuxedo. Made my whole trip. (Okay, maybe a slight exaggeration, but still.)
The villa. Tell me everything. Is it as luxurious as it looks in the photos? (Because sometimes they lie...)
Right, the photos. The *photos*. They’re… good. Very good. And, I'll admit, I had a minor heart attack before arriving, convinced I'd walk into a total disaster, a glorified glorified shed. But, *whew*, Villa Vicina is actually pretty darn close. Okay, so maybe the fluffy white towels in the bathroom don't *quite* look as pristine as they do online (life, you know?), and the pool *might* be a *smidge* smaller than it appears. But the whole thing is clean, well-maintained, and honestly, just… lovely. It *felt* like a proper holiday. Which, let's face it, is the main thing.
The best part? The balcony. The goddamn balcony. I spent hours there, drinking wine, watching the sunset, and feeling like I was, finally, actually *relaxing*. It's where I made some of my best travel decisions (e.g., "Should I order a second bottle of wine? Absolutely."). Don’t expect a spotless, minimalist aesthetic. It's lived-in, welcoming, and a bit... real. There's character. There's charm. And, yes, there's usually a stray sunbed. That's the sign of a good holiday place.
Is the kitchen well-equipped? Can I actually cook there? (I'm not a chef, but I can scramble an egg.)
The kitchen... okay, here's the real talk. I consider myself a functional cook. I can operate a microwave without setting off the smoke alarm. Villa Vicina's kitchen IS equipped well. Pans? Check. Utensils? Check. A fridge that keeps things cold? Double check. There's even a coffee machine, which is practically a necessity for civilized existence, and let's not forget that most of the time I just eat out. So how about it? The closest supermarket is close, so you can grab some stuff there to save some cash.
Here's the thing, though. You're in Crete! Are you *really* going to spend your precious vacation time scrubbing pots when you can be eating delicious, affordable Greek food? Probably not. But, if you *do* want to cook, you've got the tools. And that's what counts.
What about noise? Is it quiet at night? I need my beauty sleep.
Noise... ah, the eternal question of the weary traveler. Villa Vicina is in a reasonably quiet area. You're not going to be serenaded by late-night karaoke (thank god!). You will hear the occasional distant dog bark (Crete has a LOT of dogs, as I discovered), and the gentle hum of the cicadas. Honestly, it's mostly peaceful. I slept like a baby. Mostly. There was that one night the neighbours had a party. Which, I suppose, is always a risk. (Earplugs. PACK EARPLUGS, people. They’re your best friends on holiday.) But, generally, yeah, pretty quiet. Blissfully so. Except for the phantom snoring I swear was happening in my own head.
Parking? Is it a nightmare? Because I hate parking.
Parking... ahhh. The perennial bane of the vacationer's existence. Honestly, parking at the villa? Surprisingly easy. There's space. There's *actual* space. Not the kind of space that requires three point turns and a prayer. It's a win. Not a massive, earth-shattering win, you understand. But a definite win. That thing makes a huge difference so you don't have to worry!
Okay, spill it. What was the *one* thing that didn't quite live up to the hype? Be honest!
Alright, alright, I'll be honest. There was one MINOR thing. This is me being *super* picky, mind you. The Wi-Fi signal. It's not the super-speedy, streaming marathon kind of WiFi. Look, I get it. I was on holiday. I probably shouldn't have needed it anyway. But when I tried to upload the *perfect* sunset photo to Instagram (because, priorities), it took... a while. A *long* while. Like, "is this dial-up?" long. (Okay, maybe not *that* bad.) But, a tiny, weeny, inconsequential blipLuxury Stay Blog
